Did they really just say that?

 So, as you may have noticed it is not just physical health I talk about on this blog but also mental health...

I wanted to get this off my chest as I have seen this happen a lot recently. 

But, whoever you are, whether you are a close friend with someone, a family member, a stranger, it is NOT okay to comment on someone else's body image.

Don't get me wrong there are positive ways of commenting on someone's body image but I still think it's an extremely sensitive topic that in my opinion should be taken out of the equation entirely. This may be a controversial thing to say but if you know where I have come from I think you can start to understand my concerns.

It doesn't matter if someone has had an eating disorder, or lost weight drastically or gained weight or whatever the body change is that person could have severe body dysmorphia, they could be so affected by this that this stops them from leaving the house, from visiting friends or having any self-confidence in themselves. The anxiety builds and who knows what implications this could lead to, it could be the one little thing that pushes a person over the edge, and I am sure nobody wants that to happen. 

You could say something benign like 'You look different' or 'You look a little fuller than I remember' and this could cause someone to go into a deep depression for days.

 Other comments like 'Your stomach is like mine' or 'You have gained weight' or even 'You look too thin now' are not on. 

You have no idea what that person is struggling with and how they are dealing with their own body struggles. They could be trying really hard to lose weight, to gain muscle, or even to gain weight and they are finding it difficult. But all that effort, all that trying, goes down the drain with that one tiny comment that you may think nothing of. 

I will give you a personal example of my own - when I started losing weight I did it fairly drastically as I have explained in other posts, I was going to the gym 7 times a week, eating a lot less than I should have been and so the weight was coming off fairly easily. I remember, very vividly, someone at university commenting saying that I looked thinner and my face was less round now. I took that and thought 'I never want a round face again' and I should keep losing weight, and I did...to my detriment. Now, was it that person's fault that I lost too much weight? absolutely not. But what I am trying to say is you have no idea how the smallest comment can affect those around you.

Another example I vividly remember (it's weird how these things stick in your mind, right?) is a previous partner of mine mentioned my underarms one day as I was getting out of the shower - he wobbled them and said I was flabby, I will mention that at this point in my life I was around 6 stone and nearly the thinnest I had ever been. Well, after that comment I ran to the gym, started going 2 times a day, and lost 5kg in one week...it got to me that much. 

I know these are drastic examples from someone who has or had an eating disorder at the time but it still does not excuse the comments that were made.

I know how upset people can get, especially when they have been working hard at the gym or at their diet when someone comments on their 'lack of muscle' or the fact that they have a big bum or a belly. 

You may be someone who is completely comfortable with their body, and kudos to you! But that does not mean that you can then use that confidence to put other people down...

If any else has an opinion on this, please let me know, but unless you are a trained medical professional please be aware of what you are saying about other peoples body. That also goes for things like skin conditions/dandruff/facial features - no matter what it is, shut up. Keep your nasty thoughts to yourself. 

And as the saying goes; if you can't say anything nice...well, you know the rest.

Peace out!